


Secrets

by Mitsuki81



Series: Secrets Series [1]
Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: (both only mentioned, Angel Family, Angst with a Happy Ending, Aziraphale was created after the fall (Good Omens), Big Brother Gabriel, Crowley Was Raphael Before Falling (Good Omens), Fluff and Angst, Gabriel Not Being An Asshole (Good Omens), Gabriel is a Softie, Gabriel is full of angst (Good Omens), Gabriel is not a bastard (Good Omens), Gen, Good!Gabriel (Good Omens), I may or maynot change the title, I suppose, I'm french, Ineffable Bureaucracy (Good Omens), Ineffable Husbands (Good Omens), Nice Gabriel (Good Omens), No Betas We Fall Like Crowley, OOC Gabriel (Good Omens), Overuse of capital letters, POV Gabriel (Good Omens), Sad Gabriel (Good Omens), This is an AU, backgrounds relationship, full of mistake, lol, mainly followed the book/tv show, no beta read this, obviously, you're going to cry blood because of the mistake
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-14
Updated: 2019-09-18
Packaged: 2020-10-18 17:17:28
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 14,330
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20642819
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mitsuki81/pseuds/Mitsuki81
Summary: There's a lot of things that they don't know. That no one knows but him.It was okay.And even if sometimes it was hard, he kept marching on. He was used to it after all.It was one of his many secrets, not the first one, and certainly not the last.But one thing was for certain, he would keep his family safe.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~An alternative timeline/universe in which Gabriel has a lot of things on his mind and is not a bastard, simply an angel full of concealed emotions.It's Gabriel POV here, and he is quite OOC. I mainly follow the events of the book/tv show, with a part before the Canon at the beginning, and a little something in the end.I'm not an English writer! So sorry for all the mistakes! ^^'





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello there! And welcome to this little OS! :D 
> 
> Yes, another fandom, I know, but hey! Inspiration is an inspiration! XD
> 
> So, this is an AU. I wanted t write something a little angsty with soft feeling featuring a ‘good Gabriel’, because hey, I could, so why not?
> 
> Anyway, the idea came from the fact that maybe Gabriel is suppressing a lot of emotions, ya know… Seeing part of his family fall, living with the fact he couldn’t protect them, having to protect those who are left…
> 
> So yeah, Warning, but you’ll get an OOC!Gabriel here!
> 
> And I did little modification too, so it’s an ‘alternate timeline’ AU style if I’m clear (I hope!)  
I’m trying my best to be the most accurate possible about all the religious stuff (archangel and all), but for the sake of this story, I’m going to do some changes (like, Azrael or Samael, they’re are not Archangels, but then again, there are only three archangels recognizes as such, those being Michael, Gabriel and Raphael, but I’m going to add a few more/do some changes, just to make it fits more… I hope I’m clear while writing this! xD)  
Also, as you must have realized, I’m not an English native. I’m French and, well… I try my best! ^^’
> 
> I used Grammarly to check the mistakes, but it’s the basic version (not the ‘premium’ one, but being a university student and all, I’m poor, lol! X’) ) Anyway, if you are not currently crying blood, I hope you’ll like this little OS!^^ 
> 
> A little warning for little mild language and little depictions of blood!
> 
> I owned nothing. Good Omens and its characters are the exclusive proprieties of Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman, and mea culpa, at some point, I used dialogue from the TV show…
> 
> As for the footnote, I have no idea of how it works, so here, the story is divided in ‘sub-part’ (the ‘~*~’ marks the end of one and the beginning of another). I indicated my footnotes using ‘*’, so to read to one liked to it, you’ll have to scroll down a little until you find the ‘*’ corresponding (one, two, three of them depending on which footnote you are currently reading) then scroll up back to continue your reading. And at each new ‘sub-part’, I restart at zero about the ‘*’ (or else, I would get ‘**************************’ like footnote indication, lol!)
> 
> Enjoy! o/

~*~

_One could say that I’m a fucking bastard. And I couldn’t disagree with them. But the fact is, I was never meant to be the good guy in this story. Or rather, in _their_ story. And at the same time, there are so many things that they don’t know, that no one but me, and maybe the Almighty if She’s still looking our way, know. _

_But it’s okay._

_It will be my secret, like so many others. Like all those I keep to myself from the Beginning, and even before that._

_And as I’m watching you, dear brother, looking so happy now that everything ended (or maybe start anew?), I can’t help but be proud of you, and if the cost to see you so happy is by the hate you feel toward me, then it’s okay._

_I promise this to you long ago, didn’t I? _

_So please, please, Raphael._

_Be Happy._

~*~

"I am not a good person, I'm just a person trying to do good, there's a difference" - Gentleman of the light

~*~

The first thing he was aware of was the light of a warm smile and a soft touch on his forehead.

Not that he could see what Her face looks like, but he was overwhelmed by the shining warm, soft light of Her Love.

He lifted his head toward Her, purple eyes blinking slowly as everything around him began to take shape. He could almost see several other beings surrounding him, looking at him with curiosity, but all he could truly understand at this moment was that he was alive and that She loved him.

And it was enough to make him cry.

Smiling down at him with a soft expression, She said :

**Welcome to life, My Child. Your name is Gabriel.**

And from this day*, Gabriel, Strenght of God**, began his life in Heaven.

For Gabriel, new to the concept of ‘living’, everything Up There was a wonder, shining land of Peace filled with Her Love.

He was looking around him with huge eyes, wondering what could be the purpose of such a place, and still, he was filled with a feeling of belonging that warmed every inch of his being. And She was with him to explain what was his purpose There.

**You, Gabriel, are an Angel, one of My Creation, but you’re not any kind of Angel. You are an Archangel.**

And then, She introduced him to other Archangels, like him.

First, there was Michael, the oldest one, the first Angel to be created, one whose eyes dared you to wonder ‘Who’s like God, if not God Themself?’. She looked distant, cold, and Gabriel knew from this moment that gaining her trust would be a hard task. Still, when her gaze laid upon him, it was filled with so much love that he almost choked on his non-existent breath.

Then, there was Samael, and his smile was so radiant that it almost blinded him. When the older one saw him rubbing his teary-eyes, Samael burst into a beaming laugh that warmed Gabriel in the inside (even if it was quite different from Her Warm), and he ruffled his hair with a hand.

Azrael was the third to who he is introduced, but the Archangel doesn’t speak to him, barely sending a smile his way before going away. Samael told him not to mind, as Azrael had (or will have) one of the most difficult tasks that could be given to an Angel. When Gabriel asked him what this task was, Samael simply smiled at him and said nothing.

Both Samael and Michael showed him all of Heaven (or what existed already of it at this time) until they came across the far end of it, and Gabriel, mesmerised, watched how his two older siblings spread their wings wide behind them and fly in the big void around Heaven.

Maybe it’s interesting to note that it was at this point that Gabriel realized he had wings too***, and his very first lesson since he was brought to life is to learn how to use them, under the guidance of a smiling Samael and an exasperated-yet-fond-looking Michael.

And Up Above them, The Almighty watched them with fondness, beaming with pride.

~*~

*Well, the concept of 'day', or time for that matter, is not invented yet, but for the sake of the clarity of this story, we will simply assume it’s the case.

**For those who are wondering, the name ‘Gabriel’ means ‘God is my strength’. A lot of names refers to God in a way or another, but hey, it was still one of the first names She gives, so She had to find inspiration somewhere!

***Well, to be more exact, when the two archangels flew straight above him, the sound they created scare Gabriel so much that his wings immediately burst from his back to shield him. Then, the sudden presence of wings of his own surprised the young angel so much that he fell backwards on his back. Gabriel will then try to make Samael and Michael forget the whole incident for quite some time.

~*~

Life in Heaven was, for Gabriel, something incredibly amazing but also quite boring sometimes. Even if time hadn’t been invented yet, one could say that he spent the first few years of his life learning all he had to know for his role as an Archangel. He learnt how to sing Her Praise, how to reproduce the things she created, to befriend the other angels.

Samael and Michael have been his models, teaching him what it was to be an angel, then his friends, and now, Gabriel couldn’t help but wonder if they weren’t something more. Once, he had asked Her about it.

And She had chuckled.

**My dear, beloved Child, only you know the answer to this question.**

Then She left him, and Gabriel was left to wonder. Then he decided to keep the answer he found at this moment to himself.

After all, he isn’t sure that Samael and Michael feel the same way toward him.

~*~

One of the things that Gabriel loved to see the most was when She brought to life another Creation.

He was always amazed by how she took elements to create something, by the amount of care and love she put in every one of them. But the thing he loved to watch the most was the moment when she bent over her Creation and put a Kiss of Life on them, when Her Light entered their body and the creation began to live. He loved to be nearby simply just to watch her create something and feel her Love and the wonder in the eyes of Her creation when they began to live.

Sometimes, Gabriel surprised himself to _long_ to be able to do the same thing, to be able to create something as beautiful as Her creation, but then, he remembered that only Her was able of such miracle and that simply watch her was enough to satisfy him*.

Still, when no one was around, Gabriel went to a remote part of Heaven and tried to create something. He found a way to make a shape that vaguely reminded him of Her creations, but each time, they lacked something to give them consistency, and he then hid them somewhere no one could ever find them.

Well, not exactly. She always took his half-created creation out of their hiding place, looking at them with a fond pride, seeing that Her Child was able to create thing She hadn’t think of, using some of them for Her own creations (which will, for example, allow her to create the owls), and the rest, too abstract, well… It will not harm anyone if She uses them to make clouds, right? And maybe some part of Her Big Project will be able to see the things Gabriel had tried to create in them?

Who knows? It’s ineffable, after all.

~*~

*What Gabriel didn’t know was that She was aware that he was watching her, even when he was supposed to complete one of his assigned tasks and not wander Heaven knows where... And She’s happy to see that one of Her Child seems to enjoy the act of creating. She has done the right thing she put in him this tiny bit of her still-in-progress concept of imagination and creativity. Seems it was blooming into something quite interesting in the angel.

~*~

When Gabriel found himself on the ground, it was because he was so lost in his thought that he hadn’t seen that he was running into another angel.

“Oh, Dear Lord, I’m so sorry!” said a voice, and a hand appeared in his line of vision.

“It’s nothing” answered Gabriel while taking the offered hand.

Once back on his feet, he took a good look of the angel he had bumped into…

… And found himself at loss of words.

The other angel, with long black hair, red lips and light blue eyes gave him a gentle smile before saying something else he didn’t catch, then flying away, leaving behind them a soft scent in the air.

It was Samael who found him several hours later. Gabriel, in his daze, hadn’t moved from his spot since the other angel departure.

As for the feeling that had bloomed in his chest… Well, maybe he could try to see if he couldn’t find the other angel to discuss a bit more...

After all, he hadn’t asked for their name.

~*~

The birth of one of Her creation was always something to see. The birth of an Angel was something else.

But the birth of an Archangel was certainly not something that happened every day (the last one happened to be Gabriel)

Gabriel, living in Heaven for more than eight thousands of years*, was in the front row, almost breathing down the Almighty metaphorical neck to have a good look to the one who will become a part of his family (a concept that Gabriel kept secret in the bottom of his heart because, one, he wasn’t sure from where the idea came from** and two, because he was pretty certain that Samael and Michael didn’t exactly consider him the same way he did, or at least, it was the feeling he had, the older Archangels not being used to give signs of affection). All he could see was a tiny form with long, curly, fiery red hair.

The Almighty, as always, seemed to take great care to each of Her movements, adding a few things here and there, things that no one but Her seemed to understand, and Gabriel, like he always had, looked at her with wonder shining in his purple eyes.

Next to him, an angel was chuckling, and from the corner of his eyes, he saw that it was Leliel, and he felt something warm crept on his face when their eyes caught his with a smile on their lips.

It was at this moment that the Almighty finished with the creation of the new Archangel, and silence fell upon all the beings surrounding Her and Her creation.

It was the moment where she was about to give Her Kiss and that the new being will be welcome to their new life.

But she paused before turning toward the crowd gathered.

**Gabriel**.

He froze, not knowing what to do as She gazed into his eyes with a soft look on Her face.

**Come here.**

Her voice was gentle, and She extended Her metaphorical hand toward him. Slowly, Gabriel went to Her and took Her hand. She brought him next Her to and put Her arm around him.

**Gabriel, my dear Child. This is Raphael**.

Now that he had a better view, he could see a younger face than his, rounder but with the first hint of what would be sharper features. There was also an aura of kindness surrounding the Angel that it brought a feeling of peace inside his chest.

Raphael wasn’t even ‘here’ yet, but Gabriel knew that he was going to be special.

**From now, he is your new brother, he is a part of your family**. she said, motioning toward the sleeping Archangel. Gabriel abruptly turned his purple eyes toward Her, and She simply smiled gently at him***.

**I want you to be the one to give him My Kiss.**

His eyes went wide, “My Lord?” he asked.

**I saw how much you love to watch me create, and I know that you love to create things too, even if you lack a little something that’s entirely Mine to have. That’s why I want you to give My Kiss to this Child. Because it’s something you long to do, and it’s something I want you to do. You made me proud, Gabriel, and I want you to feel the same pride I feel for all my creations.**

Then, she bent over him, kissing him, and Gabriel could feel some of Her presence filled his being and warm him inside.

He could feel Her energy coursing through his body, and when he opened his eyes (he wasn’t aware he had closed them), they were brighter than before.

She ended Her Kiss and smiled down at him, squeezing his shoulder. Gabriel looked up at her with teary, shining eyes before taking a metaphorical deep breath, then he turned toward the Archangel, bent down, and kiss his forehead.

There were gasps all around the trio, but Gabriel didn’t mind them. He could feel Her power running through him to the sleeping angel. Then he broke the contact and looked at Her with unsure eyes. She simply smiled and moved to push him to look back at the young Archangel.

Gabriel watched him stir, frowned a little before opening his eyes, revealing golden orbs with what would become stars in them, looking at him with confused but so _trusting_ eyes that Gabriel could have burst into tears here and there.

Still, he managed to speak.

“Welcome to life, Child of God. Your name is Raphael.”

Then Raphael smiled at him, and Gabriel felt something bright, and strong, and warm burst in his chest, a love different from Her love or the one he felt for Leliel or the one he had for Samael and Michael. It was something powerful and gentle at the same time, and he knew that he would never, ever hurt this angel.

“Welcome, Raphael. I’m Gabriel, I’m your brother,” he said before choking on his tears as the young angel lunged at him to wrap his arms around him.

Gabriel returned the hug, burying his nose in the younger angel neck, one single thought ringing in his head.

_I have a family._

~*~

*by human standards, that it, and also because the concept of time hasn’t been invented yet, it could have been a blink of an eye, and by certain angels standard, the young Archangel was still quite young

**His increasing imagination that was borderline to the concept of free-will, if you were wondering

***What he didn’t know was that no one but him heard and will hear what She had and will say during the birth of the Archangel Raphael.

~*~

_I’m looking at you, Raphael, as you sleep, and I can’t help but thank God for letting me have you as my brother._

_You, who are so new to life in the Heaven, are the light that kept my days and nights bright and helps me to be my better self. You have no idea how much you helped me. _

_Even if I consider Michael and Samael as a part of my family, you are different. Maybe it’s because She gave me the chance to be the one to breathe life into you? Or maybe it’s simply because I’m giving you the love I longed from my other siblings? Watching you bloomed into the best angel you could ever be is for me my greatest joy, and I hope that you’ll ever be happy and never lose your smile._

_My dear, dear brother, I promise you that no matter what, I’ll be there for you, shielding you from any harm, protecting you from all those who’ll want to suffer. I promise you that no matter what, my affection toward you will never change._

_I love you, Raphael._

~*~

“Raphael! WATCH OUT!”

There was something akin to an explosion in the middle of the void surrounding the Heaven, and two figures went flying backwards, knocked on their back by the backlash.

The blast echoed miles and miles away, and the two Archangel needed a few moments to regain consciousness.

And then Gabriel sat and glared at his brother.

“Seriously?” he asked between gritted teeth, “Did you _really_ thought that messing with Hydrogen was a good idea?!”

“Hey! It’s not like you weren’t curious too!” shot back Raphael, “Moreover, I didn’t that it was going to explode!”

“Well, maybe next time you-” his voice abruptly stopped when his eyes caught the light of something next to them, then he gasped.

Raphael looked behind him, wondering what had caught his brother attention, and he saw it.

It was a ball of flaming light, warm and blinding floating in the middle of the void, and both angels stayed speechless in front of it, wondering what in Heavens had just happened.

“Did we… Create something…?” eventually asked Raphael.

“No” answered Gabriel, “You created something.” he added before grinning madly at his brother, “Do you think you could reproduce it?”

“Err… Maybe?”

“Awesome! We should show it to the Almighty!”

“WHAT?!” shrieked Raphael, “You can’t be seriously insinuating what I think you are…”

“Of course I am! And I’m pretty certain She’s going to love it!” smiled Gabriel, “Come on! Let’s go home!” he exclaimed, then with a laugh, took Raphael’s hand in his, he began to fly back from where they were coming, his embarrassed brother behind him.

It wasn’t long after this incident that Raphael was tasked with creating more, and more, and more of those stars, but also nebulas and constellations, and before everyone knew it, the void surrounding the Heavens was filled with billions of shining points.

Once, Raphael came to him and dragged him to a certain part of the universe* until they reach a little system in which two stars were gravitating around each other. Gabriel glanced down at his brother who smiled brightly at him.

“Those stars are called Rigil Kentaurus and Toliman, and together, they are Alpha Century.” he explained, “I created it so that neither of them is alone. They are supposed to represent family, or at least, it’s how I saw them.” he added before scratching his head, “Of course, there are also other systems with two or more stars, but you see, I have the feeling that this one is different and…”

Raphael didn’t finish his sentence as Gabriel seized him in a hug, to which the younger angel answered eagerly.

No words were needed.

~*~

*It was the name She gave to the void space around Heaven after Raphael’s work with the stars. She had added that it was the perfect decor for Her Big Project.

~*~

Gabriel didn’t like the smug look on Raphael's face.

“What?” he growled, his cheeks red.

“Nothing~,” said the younger one innocently, “It’s just that you spend an awful lot of time with Leliel lately~...” he added in a sing-song voice

Gabriel huffed loudly, feeling the warmth from his check spreading to the rest of his face.

“Aw, come on! No need to be so shy!” said playfully Raphael, “It’s great to see that you can get along so well with other angels! But there one word of advice…” continued the younger one before murmuring,

“You should wear a scarf for a few days, you have a hickey just there,” he said while poking at the mark, and Gabriel became even redder.

“RAPHAEL! Mind your own business!” he shrieked, putting one hand against his throat and his little brother burst into a laugh.

“Gabriel and Leliel under a tree!” he began to sing, “K-I-S-S-I-N-!”

He never had the chance to finish it as the older Archangel began to chase him all across Heaven, the face red and screaming at Raphael who was running and laughing like a mad… Well, mad angel. They received weirds looks from the other angels, but even them shrug it off, as it was quite common to see the two Archangels bickering about almost everything.

Eventually, both brothers became tired of running, and they decided to settle in a nice spot in Heaven.

“Now there.” finally said the younger angel, 'miracling' a long piece of dark white between his hands, “to cover your neck.”

“... Thanks.” answered Gabriel while taking it and putting it, his cheeks still red, “And now that you’re done with teasing me, can I ask you something?”

“Which is?” said Raphael, tilting slightly his head, and a bit of light got caught in the golden ring on his left ear.

“Is there… An angel Up here that you fancy?” asked the older one, “Because you seem pretty aware of my… Ah… Involvement with Leliel, but I’m rather curious about you, dear brother.”

At that question, Raphael had a nervous laugh, “Well, the truth is… No one.”

Gabriel's eyebrows flew up to his forehead behind his hair, “Really? No one?”

“No one.” sighed Raphael, “The fact is… Well… I think I need someone who could complete me. Be my best match in every way possible, who’ll be able to get under my skin and press at all my buttons, but also that I could trust with absolutely everything. It would have to be someone gentle, caring, call my an old silly but someone angelic but at the same time someone not too naive either, but someone who’ll be able to… to… Think by themself? And…” he laughed nervously, “The more I hear myself talk, the more I think that such being couldn’t exist. And there are still so many things, small details…” he looked playfully at Gabriel before asking with a hint of sarcasm, “You wouldn’t happen to know someone who’ll happen to be my perfect match, don’t you?”

Gabriel looked at him with a gleam in the eyes, and a mischievous grin began to appear on his face, “I do.”*

Raphael's face fell, “I don’t like this look on your face right now.” and Gabriel burst into laughs before putting his arm around his brother’s shoulder and ruffling his hair.

~*~

*And it was the case, he knew exactly what kind of angel would perfectly fit with his little brother. But, the truth was that the meeting couldn’t happen yet…

~*~

“Gabriel?”

“Hum?”

“Can I talk to you a minute?”

The uneasy tone in his brother's voice was enough to bring Gabriel out of his reflexion about his current project* and he gazed at Raphael worried face.

“Let’s get somewhere a little less crowded.” answered the older angel, and the two brothers flew a little away from Heaven.

Once he was certain they were alone, floating in the void next to a ball of rock and water, Gabriel turned toward Raphael and put a comforting hand on his shoulder, “What’s the matter?”

“It’s… It’s about Samael…” said Raphael, and Gabriel felt himself grew cold.

He had always known that his older brother was kind of free-thinker, that he bathed is the… Ah, privileges of his statue in Heaven as an Archangel, but still… Something was wrong with him. And if Raphael (one of the most clueless angels he knew) saw it too, then maybe something terrible was going to happen.

It had begun a few times ago, when God, who had begun to distance Herself from them to concentrate on her Big Project**, announced something through the voice of the Metatron. They learned that she was creating something called Earth in which will be a place named Eden where everything and every living being She and some angels had created (thus explaining Gabriel working on creating plants). But one of Her creation down there will be more important than any other.

She called them Humans.

She explained to them all they had to know about them, and She had finished by saying that the Angels, even immortal being, should serve the Humans and bow to them, to be there for them, to protect them, as they were also beloved Children of Her and that the angels should treat them as they treat each other, that they had to love them.

Gabriel had found nothing to say to this and even was eager to meet those ‘Humans’, wondering what they’ll be able to do with everything they had and will create. Raphael had seemed also enchanted by the Project and work twice as hard to be on time to each of his assignment.

But not all the angels seemed to have taken the news with the same enthusiasm as the other. Samael was the more vocal about it, and more and more angels began to agree to his thesis. Even Leliel seemed to be more in favour of Lucifer than God, and this fact worried Gabriel a big deal.

They were in disagreement with God, the one who created everything, even them… What would happen if they began to…?

He shivered.

“I understand. I am also worried for him, and the others.” answered the older of the pair.

“I saw Azrael a little earlier.” continued Raphael, “The look in his eyes... He seemed so sad… Like he was knowing that something bad was going to happen and that he’ll have a role to play in this horrible thing that is going to happen, and by God, I can’t help but feel that everything will end badly and that we’re going to be separated, and… And…”

Tears rolled on his cheeks as he looked helplessly at his big brother.

“I’m _scared_, Gabriel.”

It was enough for the older one to rush toward his sibling and engulfed him in his arm, shielding both of them with his wings. Raphael hid his face in the crook of his big brother neck, and Gabriel had the younger angel firmly secured in his arm, one hand tracing circles in his back in a soothing motion.

They stayed like this for quite some times, Gabriel murmuring words of reassurance in his brother's ears, telling that everything was going to be alright, even if he half-believed his own words.

And next to them, the blue planet, the Earth, reflected the light of the sun on the pair, enveloping them in a soft azure halo.

~*~

*God had given him free rein about inventing something to fill a certain place (Eden), he had been working on his plants for quite some time now.

**Also, unknown to any of them, to see how the ‘free-will’ She had put in all Her angels was going to turn out. And seeing it had turned out well for Gabriel and Raphael, maybe it could be interesting to see how it was going to work with the rest of them?***

***And in this case, She was wrong. It was Her last mistake because, after that, She began to plan everything, but it’s a story for another time.

~*~

The time came and passed, ‘Earth’ was since long created, and the Garden was in its way to been soon finished when everything came crashing down upon all of them.

“Samael! You can’t simply say things like that!” cried Raphael at his older brother, “God loves us all equally, and that’s why She wants to love her newest creation like we all loved each other-!”

“Ah! Is that what you really think?!” cut harshly the other Archangel, “God doesn’t give a shit about us! You’re just too brainwashed to realizes that fact!”

The blasphemy rang through Heaven like a bell as thousand of angels standing behind Samael nodded approvingly.

Raphael was watching them with horror, “Samael… Do you realize what you just said?!”, and the wicked grin that made its way on the older one face was a chilling one.

“Oh, but I’m perfectly aware of that.” he said before turning toward his followers, “My dear friends! We have suffered God negligence for far too long! It is clear for me now that she doesn’t really care about us, and her desire for us to bow and serve her newest creation called humans who are, by many points, inferior at us is intolerable!” he continued while spreading his hands and wings wide, “It’s time for us to take our fate in our own hands and prove that the reign of God is finally over!” And this exclamation was followed by far too many cheers to Raphael taste.

He went to his older brother, putting one hand on his shoulder.

“Samael, please-!” but the next moment, he had the blade of a sword sitting just under his jaw, against the thin skin of his neck.

“I won’t stand for this any time longer!” he hissed between his teeth, and as Raphael was looking into his deep green eyes, he was brought to another time.

_“Can you tell us another story?” asked a far younger and newly born Raphael as he sat between Gabriel and Michael, Samael in front of them, the four of them floating in the void around the Heaven._

_“Fine, fine, but that’s my last one.” chuckled Samael before a thoughtful look appeared on his face._

_“Once, I had asked God about those concepts of Hers, ones that She hasn’t created yet, that she called ‘Time’ and ‘Eternity’, and She told me this: _

_“Try to imagine Time as something flowing and passing, and once it had passed, you can never go back on it. It’s the inevitable course of things, something that you, dear creation of Mine, are not under yet, but at the same time are already. Eternity is something that has no beginning and no end, but at the same time something truly and utterly there. It is something that was already before me, and it’s as wide as the void surrounding the Heavens.” said Samael, and even if Raphael didn’t seem to understand half the words he had said, the older angel had such soothing, deep voice that he could almost hear God’s voice through the angel’s._

_He continued._

_“Then She told me: ‘Try to imagine where the very far end of the void around Heaven is,’ and I nodded and She smiled, ‘Knows that at this far end of this void is a diamond mountain, such a huge mountain that it takes a lot of time to climb, go around or go down it. And every hundred of years, there’s a little bird who goes to that mountain, sharpens its beak on it and goes away. And every hundred of year, he will come again, until the mountain is entirely chiselled away. And once this mountain is chiselled away, then you know one second of eternity has passed’.” told Samael before laughing at the lost expression on his siblings face._

_“Don’t worry, I hadn’t understood it either, and She told me that one day it will make sense. And you’ll all have to know that I’m still struggling to understand what she meant by ‘day’ at that moment!”_

_The four of them laughed at this comment, leaving warmth spread all across the void around them and in them._

And Raphael was still feeling this warmth long gone in his chest as his eyes were still in Samael's wild ones as he prepared to plunge his blade in his throat-.

Steel met steel, and suddenly, Samael's grip on him disappeared as a figure came in front of the younger Archangel, wielding a sword of their own.

“You went too far this time, Samel.” hissed coldly Michael, protecting her brother with her body, “And I won’t let you hurt one of us like this!” she yelled before attacking the other one.

And thus began the War in Heaven.

~*~

Gabriel hated all of this.

He hated seeing angels fighting angels, brothers killing sisters, seeing all the golden blood of his family scatter on Heaven’s ground.

And he could feel guilt gnawn him little by little. He should have done something sooner! Trying to show them that they were wrong! That they were still loved by Her! That God didn’t abandon them*!

Once he had to wield his sword against his sweet, gentle, lovely Leleil, and it had killed him inside to see the wrath, the hatred in her once beautiful eyes that he almost broke apart on his spot. And he would have been dead if it hadn’t been for Raphael coming to his rescue at the very last moment.

And now, Gabriel had no idea if his former lover was still alive, but his more frantic thought was to know where his little brother was in this instant.

He had to protect him!

Running through the battlefield, he found him as the younger one tried to fight off one of the rogue angels.

Gabriel recognizes him as one of those who created the most colourful creatures of the Garden, and he was ready to give the fatal blow at Raphael.

Before he knew what he was doing, Gabriel jumped between the two and took, even if it weren’t fatal, the most of it, and he fell to the ground, golden blood flowing from his wound. Another angel came by and fight the rogue one as Raphael dragged him away from the scene, tears falling from his eyes like an endless flow.

“Crap, crap, crap, crap!” he muttered between his teeth as he began to heal his brother wound and Gabriel put a shaking hand on his little brother arm.

“It’s… It’s alright…” he murmured, and Raphael snapped.

“Alright, you said?! Alright?! No! Nothing is alright! You’re hurt! And we are killing each other for what?! Trying to prove who’s wrong and who’s not?! That’s bullshit!”

Gabriel could feel the anger rolling like waves out of his brother aura, but there was also something else in the air, something some much more powerful, ancient, resentful…

The judgment was coming.

Gabriel knew that he had to stop his brother before he said something he would then regret.

“Raphael… Please…” he murmured, but his brother was too lost in his suffering to listen to him.

“I’m not saying that Samael is right or anything, but did She do something to prevent all that?! All the hurt and devastation?! Doesn’t she see how it tortures us inside? How we are hurting each other?!”

“Raphael… Stop!”

“Why didn’t she do anything to stop this?! Why does she let you get hurt?!” he screamed, and then, it was too late.

Something snapped in the Heaven and a Holy presence appeared, enveloping everything in Her wrath.

**By my words, all those who wronged me, doubt me and cursed My name shall be punished and burn for all the rest of Eternity!**

And then, the ground opened under their feet. The angels who stayed loyal to Her didn’t feel a thing, but the other…

Dark ropes rise from under them and wrapped around their ankles, dragging them Downward, beginning by Samael whose scream echoed during his entire Fall.

One by one, all the rebels angels fell, shooting stars falling through the universe as their Grace was stripped from their bodies, flames enveloping them as they Fall and burn, burn, burn.

This was God’s punishment, and she had no mercy.

Even to those who said things without meaning it.

“Gabriel!” was the alarmed cry of Raphael as the Darkness grabbed him by the ankles.

The older one took his brother hands in his, trying to not let go as he was dragged downward, tears flowing from his eyes as he begged, and begged God to have mercy on his little brother.

_He didn’t mean it! He was loyal to you until the very end! He just snapped! Please! Don’t Punish him!_ he prayed, but God, too enraged, didn’t listen to his plea, and it was a matter of seconds before his weak grip on Raphael's hands lessen, and the next moment, all that Gabriel could see was the panicked face of his little brother Falling as his Grace, ripped from his being, glowed around him like a halo.

Gabriel, half falling from the hole in the ground, tried helplessly to stop his brother fall, trying to grab something that would keep him Up There, but this was pointless.

Then he felt God spreading Her Presence all around them, from Heaven to the diamond mountain at the end of the universe to the depth of the hole where the rebelling angels had fallen.

And before darkness took Gabriel consciousness away, he felt his fingers closed around something small and cold.

And that was all.

~*~

*But this affirmation leaves a bitter taste in his mouth, not believing it fully but not foolish enough to say it aloud.

~*~

When Gabriel opened his eyes, everything had changed.

For one, a third of the angels living before the war were dead, another third had been banished from Heaven and the last third were left up there, licking their wounds, weeping for their lost one.

Then, that now the war was finished, and that God had punished the rebels, they needed to rebuild all that had been destroyed and that it was time for new angels to be born.

And thirdly, every angel had forgotten about the Fallen one.

This bit of information hit Gabriel hard when he discovered that no one seemed to remember the names or the faces of those who had been banished from Heaven, simply remembering they were once part of them, then they weren't, and that was all. And from what he had heard, it was the same for the Fallen.

And the worst in all of that was the fact that Gabriel remembered _everything_, each single names, faces, angels were etched in his memories, burning his mind with grief knowing that he was the only and last being able to mourn the loss of their friends and family.

But the last blow to Gabriel fragile emotional state came when he realized that he fist was still clenched around something.

Slowly, he had opened his hand, and he could have died on his spot as new tears began to flow from his eyes down his face.

It was Raphael golden earring.

And for hours and hours, Gabriel cried for the loss of his little brother, clinging like a drowning man to a lifeline at the little golden ring, his last reminder of a time forever gone.

~*~

Little by little, Heaven returned to its little routine, the older angels taking back their old roles, the new ones filling the vacant ones.

Michael had finally lost the last reminder of softness and joy in her eyes, the little gleam which had disappeared from her gaze the exact second she wielded her sword against Samael, and her relationship with Gabriel went from the one between siblings to a professional one*, and the younger (and remaining) Archangel couldn’t blame her for that, even if he had the feeling that he had lost more than two siblings with the Fall after that.

God, after passing down Her judgment and erasing the memories of all the angels (loyal and fallen alike) had quickly filled the vacant places created by the disappearance of so many of them then returned to Her own project, finally stopped to talk to them, leaving Her creations alone to deal with Heavens and all the work they had Up There.

New angels came to fill the void left by Samael and Raphael, named Uriel and Sandalphon, and even if he couldn’t build the same relationship with them as he would have done, Gabriel swore to himself that he’ll anything in his power to keep them safe.

He won’t fail them, not like he had failed his family in the past.

Still, there was one little thing he had to deal with during this transitional period in Heaven.

It was one of his many secrets.

A gift he would never be able to give to his fallen little brother.

~*~

*Well, at this time (which had been finally invented), we couldn’t really of ‘professional relationship’, a concept which will be invented by the humans far later, but it fits the description here, knowing that the story is actually told and already happened.

~*~

** _Is it all you ask of Me, then?_ **

_“Yes, My Lord” answered Gabriel, his head bowed low, “I know I’m asking a lot from you, and I would perfectly understand if You-”_

_The Archangel was cut by the feeling of a warm hand ruffling his hair, and his purple eyes flew toward Her unseeable form_

** _You have My Blessing_ **

_At those words, Gabriel felt a wave of Her Holiness flew into his body, just enough for what he had to do. Tears began to form in his eyes as he smiled up at her._

_“Thank you, My Lord.”_

_Her radiant smile was her answer before She disappeared._

~*~

Gabriel went to a part of Heaven few angels knew of, and he found him exactly where he had left him when he had heard about the argument between Raphael and Samael.

A sleeping angel was waiting there, blond curls surrounding a soft face, a peaceful expression etched on his features, and Gabriel stared at the angel God Herself had allow him to create.

The one meant to complete his dear Raphael.

Slowly, he caressed the angel sleeping head, and Gabriel heard him sighed with delight and the Archangel’s heart tighten in his chest.

And as he felt tears beginning to form in his eyes, he took Raphael’s earring out of his pocket, and using one little miracle, transformed it into a signet ring and he passed to the new angel little finger.

_This way_, thought Gabriel, _He’ll always have a part of the one he meant to belong to with him._

Stepping back, the Archangel took one good look around him, making sure no one was around, then, after taking a small breath to gather his courage, bent down and, like he had done once upon a time with another angel, gave him Her Kiss on the forehead.

Once more, he felt Her energy coursing through his body to the angel’s, and after a few moments, his eyes fluttered open, and Gabriel was caught in a deep-blue gaze.

His breath caught in his throat.

_“You know, I really like the colour She used to paint the Earth.” had said Raphael as both Archangels were flying around God newest creation, “How is it called again?”_

_“Azure.” had answered Gabriel, “She called it Azure.” and Raphael had smiled._

_“Azure…” had said the younger one, testing how the word felt into his mouth before a soft gleam appeared in his eyes “Well, I think I found my new favourite colour.”_

The angel was still staring at him as he went back from the memory, and only two thoughts were spinning through Gabriel’s mind.

Raphael favourite colour was Azure.

_Azure…_

_Raphael…_

“Welcome to life, Child of God. Your name is Aziraphale.”

And Aziraphale smiled brightly at him, and it hurt.

~*~

It wasn’t difficult to pass Aziraphal creation as one of Hers. He just had to find the right moment, and then, it was as if nothing had happened*.

Life went on Up There. Aziraphale was ranked as a principality, and from their past experiences from the war, learn how to fight with a sword by Michael herself, and Gabriel knew how much the younger angel hated this as he hadn’t been created for such things.

And the Archangel felt conflicted by Aziraphale existence. Being the one who created him, who named him, finding in the younger angel so many things that make him feel as if he had a new sibling added to his family that he wanted to protect him between his wings and never let him go.

And at the same time, it hurt so much to watch Aziraphale going on his daily work, to see him smile or laugh or frown as everything was an echo of his lost brother that the Archangel could have killed the Principality right here and now for hurting him so much.

But it wasn’t his fault, he reminded himself. It was not his fault that he reminded the Archangel a time long lost, a time of happiness and joy filling the Heaven as it wasn’t the fault of any other angels for not remembering the Before.

At night, when he was all alone, he was plagued by visions of what happened during the war. The blood, the tears, the deads, the judgment, the Fall.

_The screams._

And Gabriel only wish was for those vision to leave him alone as he still smelled the blood in his nose, felt the blood on his face.

And each time he remembered, he could feel himself falling more and more apart.

He had yelled and cried and shout at Her, asking why he was the only one to remember all this, why he had to suffer alone, why She never answer, why, why, why?

_Why?!_

But she never said a thing, she never responded to his desperate calls.

Once upon a time, such questions would have guaranteed him a fall straight into Hell (as it seemed the Fallen one had called the place they were living in now), even She seemed tired of such things, and so Gabriel was left alone with his own darkness.

It was his burden, the rock he was pushing uphill. He loved his brothers and sisters dearly as he hated them all for their innocence and their ignorance.

He loved Aziraphale as much he had (and still) loved Raphael as much as he loathed the way he reminded him of the days they had all lost.

It was one of his many secrets, but it wasn’t the first one he had, and he certainly won’t be the last, he was certain of it.

And slowly but surely, he was consumed by his own darkness.

~*~

*Well, without mentioning the Fall and all that happened afterwards.

~*~

When She finally created humans and placed them in the Garden, Gabriel was the one to propose Aziraphale to the title of Guardian of the Eastern Gate.

The Archangel knew that the Principality didn’t like life in Heaven, and he hoped that his new assignment would be more fitted to the angel than the one he had until now.

It was also a way for Gabriel to keep Aziraphale as far as possible from himself.

The young angel reminded him too much of the Before, of good and bad memories, and more than once, Gabriel had to fight a vision from the past from taking hold of his mind while speaking with the shy Principality.

Still, he kept an eye on the Garden. Officially to be certain that everything was in order, but also with the (secret) interest in seeing how the Principality was doing.

No matter what, he was Gabriel’s little brother, and even if he couldn’t show him as much affection as he would have in the past, he still cared.

And it was during one of his ‘official visit’ in the Garden that he found himself nose to nose with Raphael.

Well, technically speaking, he was facing a giant black snake with a red belly and golden eyes.

But Gabriel couldn’t mistake him. Never. He was too acquainted with his lost brother aura to not recognize him. And for one foolish moment, he hoped to see recognition in the fallen archangel’s eye.

But there was nothing but a taint of fear, and Gabriel felt himself broke a little more. Still, he managed to shoo the snake away, as if he hadn’t felt it was another ethereal (well, now occult) being.

Then, he flew away, far from the Garden toward the sky, hoping that no one would see the tears in his eyes or the way they rolled upon his cheek.

It was later, when he was still drifting across the universe, flying next to the very first star his brother has created, that he felt it.

Something was wrong.

_Very wrong._

And God seemed not pleased at all.

For a moment, Gabriel was sent back into a time long past, where two angels were arguing which ended up in a bloodbath and the loss of so many of them.

He flew back straight to the garden, just in time to see Adam and Eve being banished from Eden.

Frowning, he began to fly toward Aziraphale to ask him what in the Heaven had just happened before stopping himself when he saw a familiar creature had crawled toward the Principality.

For what seemed to be an eternity (but in reality was a mere second), the Archangel thought that both beings will start to fight each other (as they were meant to).

But nothing happened.

This hit the older angel curiosity, and thus Gabriel made himself invisible, and he listened to all the words exchanged between two beings that were meant to be together since a very long time.

He smiled sadly when he heard Raphael-now-Crawly remarks and wonderings about what just happened and almost gave himself away with laughter when he learned that Aziraphale gave his flaming sword to the humans.

What else would have he expected from a being meant to be Raphael equal?

And even if this bit of information was meant to be a secret only between the Principality and the new demon, Gabriel decided he will keep it as well.

Later, he was the one to assign Aziraphale as Heaven representative’s on Earth as soon as he felt Raphael presence on the azure creation.

And if someone dared to ask him why he sent them away by claiming it was a punishment for the Principality’s poor job at keeping an eye on the Humans.

And no one would ever know that Gabriel only did that so that maybe the two beings he brought to life would be able to have a form of freedom on Earth together, away from the darkness that was plaguing both Heaven and Hell.

~*~

Then, time passed, and the Humans made their own path on Earth.

Aziraphale and Crawly-now-Crowley were still assigned on the Azure planet, and Gabriel had watched over them ever since the Fall of the Man.

The Archangel still had his own work in Heaven, acting as Michael right-hand man as she took over God’s duty Up There, as their creator seemed to have completely shut Herself off from the rest of the angels to work on Her “plan”, and sometimes, when everything was a bit too much for him to handle, he sneaked out down to the Earth, simply to rest himself in the soothing aura of his brother.

Even after his fall, Raph-Crowley still had the same energy pouring out of him, maybe a little bit darker, that put the older one into a sort of bittersweet state of nostalgy.

Gabriel could have cried in relief the day he heard his little brother tell to Aziraphale they couldn’t kill the children in the Flood, and maybe he had used a little angelic miracle to ensure that all the young humans the demon had hidden in the Arch would stay safe and sound.

Even if couldn’t stay too long on Earth (and couldn’t reveal himself to the two Earth representatives, of course), Gabriel liked to see his two little brothers getting along this well, happy to note that even if they meet under unfavourable circumstances, they still seemed to balance each other.

And the Archangel allowed himself to feel a little bit of Pride for having created such a best match for his little brother*.

Gabriel liked Aziraphale too, and it hurt him a lot to see that each time the Archangel came to do an “official check of how things are going down there” how the Principality seemed to be more and more cautious of him.

Of course, he couldn’t miss how both the angel and the demon learned how to act like a human and began to melt into their culture. And each passing day widened the pit between him and his brothers.

Gabriel knew somewhere around the incident with the King Arthur that he had, somehow, lost the blind trust Aziraphale still had for him until now.

But then again, the Archangel had to act like the other angels. Had to act as if he thought that humanity was below them, that they were superior to the mortal and the demons, feeling nothing but contempt for the Principality who was put as their representative down there.

And it hurt to read the mistrust in the other angel’s eyes.

Such contempt toward humanity had bought a ticket to Hell to a third of their brothers once upon a time, and now, it seemed to be a normal behaviour among the angels.

And Gabriel was the only one to realizes that. As he was the only one to remember.

But it was okay.

It was only just one more little secret, nothing else.

~*~

*More than once, he had to miracle himself away from the pair to avoid to reveal himself with his laughter (again). But hey! He couldn’t believe that Crowley could be smitten so hard to somebody! It was almost painfully obvious, and Aziraphale was so oblivious!

~*~

There was a thing that Gabriel loved the most in his duty as an Archangel (after creating things, but it was such a long time ago), it was delivering messages.

He was The Messenger, after all, the one who announced to the blessed Mary of her destiny as the Bearer and Mother of the Son of God, one of his greater accomplishment*, and he hadn’t had the chance to do this duty since quite a long time.

His actual errand was to bring to her certain young girl in England a bunch of vision from the future that Gabriel had securely attached to him in a satchel.

God (through the voice of Metatron, as she hadn’t spoken to any of them directly for a very long time) had instructed him to put all of them into the young Agnes’ mind during her sleep, telling him it was very important for the future sake and that he mustn't lose a single part of the vision he was bringing to the girl.

Gabriel was delighted to receive a new assignment from God, and even if had the feeling it wasn’t going to one of those who were going to be recorded for the next generations, he was happy to have something else to do than working on paperwork back Up There.

And maybe if he’s quick enough he’ll have the chance to take a lot upon Aziraphale and Crowley, simply to see how they were doing and how their little Arrangement was going.

More than one angel (or demon) would have been horrified to learn than one of theirs was doing the job of the opposite side, or “fraternizing” with them, but Gabriel knew the two eternal beings too well, being the one who gave them the Kiss of God, who had one as his little brother before the fall and created the other, and such agreement between the two wasn’t something surprising, knowing that they were more or less meant to each other, and the Archangel couldn’t but laugh a little at the cute picture his two siblings made when they were having a ‘moment’ together (even if he had to admit sometimes he wanted to hit them on the head because FOR CRYING OUT LOUD! MAKE A MOVE!)

And then, Gabriel flew straight into a tree.

Maybe a lot of you are wondering why this Gabriel is so much different from the one you are all acquainted, and the only answer that they could give you is that yes, this world is similar to the one you know, or maybe the one in which you are living, but there are infinite ways to tell a story, small changes that would change one’s fate, crisscrossing other paths that could have lead to something so very similar to what one would know, or something equally different.

Time was, after all, simply layers upon layers of possibilities in which some strings went lose and stew themselves up to other timelines.

In this one, the main change was that Gabriel remembered and loved too much his family.

Not that it was a bad thing.

Loving somebody too much is not, and will never be a bad thing.

It’s just a little different here.

And, ah... Maybe he had the head in the clouds, both literally and figuratively speaking (being an angel, and all…) that made him a little clumsy.

Anyway, Gabriel flew straight into a tree and let out a few curses out of his body. Detangling himself from the branches, he adjusted his satchel back with a huff and continued his way toward young Agnes’ home, flushing a little and cursing himself for being such a dork.

Finally, he came across a small village and slowly, he made his way toward one specific house.

There, he found a sleeping little girl with curly brown hair sleeping peacefully, and then, with all the care he could muster, the Archangel put the visions into the little girl mind.

Once done, he allowed himself a few moments to watch the sleeping child, taking comfort into the innocent expression on her features before bending down and kissing her on the forehead.

“May you have a blessed life, my child” he murmured to the young Agnes before flying away into Heaven.

It was much later, once in his office, that Gabriel saw that a little bit of the vision he was supposed to give to the little girl was caught in his robe, but then, it was too late, and the Archangel couldn’t return down there to give it to Agnes.

But God had instructed him to not lose a single bit of it…

_And yet…_

With a huff, he clenched the bit of vision in his hand and hid it away in one of his drawers, acting as if the whole incident never happened, and he intended to never have a look at it ever again.

There was no way anyone could ever know about that?

And it was not as if a little bit of missing mission would hurt anyone, right?

_Right_? **

~*~

*Well, without mentioning that he was so nervous that instead of miracling himself above her in a wave of Divine Light, he managed to crash upon the wooden chest where she kept her clothes, stumbled upon his wings when she tried to help him, disappeared in the next second before remembering he had something to announce to her.

**As you can expect, the answer is no. And one day in the future, as Gabriel was utterly bored, not knowing what to do, and finding by the chance the little bit of vision he had almost forgotten ever existed decided it was a good idea to have a little look at it. What he saw left him speechless for more than ten days before he realised that he messed up this time and that he had to find a way to fix things. And frankly, he prefered not to think about what would happen if he didn't…

~*~

The time came and passed on Earth and Gabriel jungled between his duties as an Archangel and keeping a (secret) look on both Aziraphale and Crowley as they made their path down there. He saw them argue, laugh, eat and growing closer more and more, and Gabriel couldn’t be more happy for them.

He had been quite alarmed when he heard about the demon holy water’s request, and for a split of a second, he thought that he little brother was going to take his own life, but no. Seemed only to be an… Insurance. If things went wrong.

And Gabriel hoped that situation never happened.

Humanity, on the other hand, was growing bigger and bigger, always imagining and inventing new things, or achieving great act both good and, unfortunately, evil. But like Aziraphale and Crowley (who spent the last six thousand years down there), the Archangel had learnt more and more about humanity, even if it weren’t at the same level as the two representatives on Earth.

Then again, when he was up in the Heaven, or ‘officially checking on Aziraphale’, Gabriel had to keep up the act of the clueless angel about human things to keep the appearances.

It would raise too many questions otherwise. And Gabriel had kept too many secrets for a too long time.

It would be too dangerous, he couldn’t risk his family safety. Not only those down on Earth, but also the other Archangels.

Michael, Uriel, Sandalphon.

He had to keep them safe, keep them happy, away from all that could hurt them.

Gabriel didn’t care if he was the only one to suffer under too many painful memories and well-kept secrets.

He was used to it.

He was for a long time, after all.

And he will continue to keep things this way so that his family (all of them) would be happy.

Then the Antichrist was born.

And it was the beginning of the end.

~*~

Gabriel kept an eye on the Antichrist, watching with half-amusement Crowley and Aziraphale taking the role of ‘Godparents’ of the child, overlooking his upbringing.

And each time the little boy blew another candle, it was if another stone had been placed in his stomach.

Because he knew that in the end, it would be a war. That angels and demons would fight each other to know who is the strongest.

It would be like the Revolution all over again. Except for this time, Gabriel will be the only one to live through it with the memories of the Past.

Crowley and Aziraphale would have to fight with their respective ‘sides’, to fight each other. And in a small part of his mind, Gabriel hoped that if this situation ever happens, then they would at least died quickly and not endure eternity without the other.

And the years came and passed, and the young Warlock was slowly, but surely, reaching his eleventh birthday.

However, there was something wrong about the boy, something that Crowley was the first to formulate.

“He is too normal.”

That was true. But no one was able to find out what.

Then, the fateful day came.

And there was no dog.

If Gabriel weren't so worried about his family safety, he would have laughed at the irony of the situation.

But there was one question that kept ringing in his mind, dread pooling at the bottom of his stomach.

_If it’s not Warlock, then… Where is the Antichrist?_

~*~

The events leading to the Armageddon were… Quite a show.

With all the preparation for the war, Gabriel didn’t found the time to check on Aziraphale or Crowley, and he had sent more than one prayer to the Almighty to keep them safe, no matter what.

The Archangel found it was more and more difficult to keep up with his act, but he had no choice at this point.

It was far too late to back off now.

And as all the angels prepare themselves for the war, Gabriel began to thought about a plan to put his family to safety if things turned out for the worst.

Sometimes, he crossed path with Michael in the halls of Heaven, when they weren’t in a meeting or anything related to the Apocalypse, except this time, the younger Archangel couldn’t help but notice that his elder siblings looked worn out.

“Michael,” he found himself calling after her, “Are… Are you alright?”

The other Archangel stopped to face him then, with a long, tired sigh, rubbed her eyes.

“Yes, yes, I am, it’s just… With all the preparation for the Armageddon, training the army and getting back into shape… I’ve hardly time for myself lately.”

Gabriel gave her a sad smile, “Same here…”

Silence filled the space between them for a few seconds, and Gabriel used this short moment when it was just the two of them to make a few steps forward and hugged Michael.

The elder one looked taken aback for a moment before returning the hug. Stayed a few moments like this, Gabriel’s face into his elder sibling neck as she caressed softly his head.

“It’s going to be okay…” she murmured, “I’m going to protect you, little brother, and I promise I won’t fail you, not as I have failed them…”

Gabriel fought back the urge to sob at these words. Of course, Michael remembered that they had two other siblings Before, but she didn’t remember who they were, what they looked like and what happened to them*.

And if Gabriel’s cross to bear was the memories of Before, well, Michael was the guilt for being unable to protect her family from harm.

“Once… Once everything is over… Would you like to go for a fly Out There? Like we used to?” asked Michael tentatively, and the younger one hugged a little harder before nodding.

“Yes… Yes, of course.”

~*~

*It was Her decision to make them aware of the fact that some angels had fall and others were dead, but she didn’t want for them to know what happened to who, so that the remaining angels wouldn’t suffer, the only exception being Gabriel. And adding the fact all the demons didn’t bare their angelic names anymore, it was almost impossible for any of them to know who they were.

~*~

The Armaggedon was… Anticlimactic, to say the least. And Gabriel had seen everything, every single bit until the destruction of the four horsemen.

Well, to be honest, he didn’t see it with his own eyes, but with a part of his conscience which was at Tadfield Airbase as the rest of his being was in the Heaven, keeping up his act and preparing the Angel Army for the War which, in the end, didn’t happen.

And inwardly, Gabriel was grinning like a fool.

_They did it! They found a way to stop the Apocalypse!_

Next to him, Michael looked utterly lost as she could feel the End going away with the disappearances of the Horsemen.

“What… What happened?” she murmured, looking lost, “The Armaggedon… It… It didn’t…”

Gabriel put one comforting hand on her shoulder.

“I don’t know, but I’m planning to get the answer to that question.”

Turning his back on the angels gathered, he went straight into his office, as a part of his consciousness was still keeping an eye on what was going on down there.

_Two young humans (one shaggy looking boy and one glassed-eyes woman) came out from one of the air-shed toward the group who were the witnesses of the disappearance of the Horsemen a few moments ago._

_The young woman’s eyes fell on Crowley, and she frowned._

_“You!” she said, and both demon and angel looked at her, “You, the man in the car, you stole my book!” she accused, and understanding made its way into his little brother eyes._

_“Oh! Book girl!” he exclaimed before grabbing something, “Catch!”_

_The demon threw the burned book at the woman, and the object made an arch in the air before falling into her awaiting arms._

_“What’s going on here?” she asked,_ and Gabriel stopped listening.

Something that should have happened at this moment didn’t, and the Archangel knew it was his fault. He’ll have to find a way to fix it, and quickly.

But before that, he still had a role to play.

Finishing his preparation, he enlightened his portal, and without further ado, he promptly disappeared in a flash of light straight toward the Earth.

As he landed on the ground of the Air Base, Gabriel saw that someone was coming from the depth of the planet, and he almost choked when he saw that it was Lelie-Beelzebub.

Oh, he had the chance to contact time to time the Prince of Hell during the last six thousand years, yet he hadn’t been in their presence since the Fall.

And a part of the Archangel heart ached for their lost love.

But he had an act to keep, and his uneasiness lasted for less than a slipt of a second.

Both representative walk toward the group of being who had stopped the Apocalypse and Gabriel tried to look as pissed as he could be, his hands in his pocket, when in the inside he was bursting with pride for his little brother.

And as the Prince of Hell exchanged a few heated words with Crowley, Gabriel wondered briefly of how ironic the situation was.

Here he was, with three of the beings that meant the world to him, and who, on the other hand, seemed to loathe him with passion, not knowing that the Archangel was glad that the war was averted.

Because it meant that he wouldn’t have to lose anybody in the end if he played his cards right.

Beelzebub asked for the boy, and Crowley moved the head, drawing his attention back to the present time toward a young boy with angelic looks and a powerful aura.

_It’s showtime_. Gabriel thought with sarcasm.

“That one.” he said, plastering a fakest smile he could on his face, “Adam Young” he continued while walking toward the Antichrist*, “Hi,” and Gabriel was almost certain that his grin was the creepiest one someone could do, “Armageddon must restart… Right now.” he said in a tense tone, and his eyes looked straight into the Antichrist ones.

_It was as if he could know that he was playing an act_.

“Temporary inconvenience can not get in the way of the Greater Good.”

He emphasized the two last words, trying to keep himself together as the Antichrist was still staring in his eyes, reading him like an open book.

_Please, please,_ he begged the boy, in case he could hear him_, Don’t say a thing…._

Finally, the boy broke the eye contact as Beelzebub began to speak, and Gabriel almost sighed in relief, and he turned out a little the discussion, deciding that acting in automatic mode would be for the best.

He was so used to play this role that it was almost frightening.

Adam said something about knowing ‘which gang is best’, and Gabriel faked-chuckle.

“Obviously. It’s the Great Plan.” he said shaking his head, “It is the entire reason for the creation of the Earth.***”

Beelzebub stepped forward to try to convince the boy to start Armageddon, but Gabriel already knew it was a lost battle.

And from the corner of his eyes, he could see the gears turning into Aziraphale mind, and it took the Archangel all his will-power not to grin like a fool, knowing that the angel he had created was coming with a plan.

“...I’ve got whole the world I want,” said Adam to Beelzebub’s temptation to restart the War, and Gabriel knew that should add a little something to nudge Aziraphale in the right direction.

“You can’t just refuse to be who you are. Your birth, your destiny, The, they’re… They’re part of the _Great Plan_!”

“Um, huh, excuse me…” interrupted suddenly Aziraphale, and all of them looked at him, “Uh, you keep talking about the Great Plan…”

“Aziraphale, maybe you should keep your mouth shut-”

“One thing I’m not clear on.” continued the younger angel, as if Gabriel hadn’t spoken, “Is that the Ineffable Plan?”

If he had could, the Archangel could have high five himself.

_You always were a clever mischevious bastard! _he thought fondly_, And I’m glad to see that you are the perfect other half to my dear little brother…!_

Beelzebub tried to contradict him, and Aziraphale still insisted on the ‘Ineffable Plan’, quickly joined by Crowley, who finally caught on what the angel was doing.

“It’s the same thing.” had protested Gabriel, to which Crowley had murmured more to himself than the other to hear, “You don’t know…”

And from this point, everything went on quite quickly.

As both Earth representatives had so cleverly suggested, there was no way to know if all that happened in the last hours weren’t a part if the Ineffable Plan. He made a great show of talking ‘in private’ with Beelzebub about having to tell to ‘ten million angels to stand down from the war footing’, and the Prince of Hell agreed with him, saying that they had the same problem with ten thousand demons.

“Well, at least we know whose fault it is,” he added in a louder voice, looking directly at the two eternal beings standing behind the Antichrist.

Crowley sent a tensed smile his way as Aziraphale gave him a little wave of the hand.

_Bastards_. he thought playfully.

Before going away, he decided to ‘lecture’ the Antichrist, insisting about the fact that he hoped that someone ‘will tell his father’ to which Beelzebub, next to him, confirmed it would be the case.

And the next moment, he popped out from the Airbase toward Heavens.

He knew what would happen next.

The apparition of Satan, then the Antichrist using his powers to reshape reality…

But he still had few things to take care of, one of them being of extreme importance if he wanted for all his family to have a happy life…

Exiting his office, he returned to the room where all the angels were waiting for him, bringing with him the ‘bad news’ of Almostappocalyspe.

~*~

*And he internally cringed inside as he said the name. He wasn't supposed to know it, for goodness sake! He has just leaned it a few moments ago when Crowley had asked the young boy his name when he was still keeping an eye on them. He could have slapped himself for his stupidity**.

**Fortunately, no one but him caught on the little mistake, thank heaven.

***He perfectly knew it was a lie.

~*~

_Gabriel was panicking. He just had re-found the bit of prophecy he had failed to give the little Agnes back in the seventeenth century. He remembered having shrugging the incident as nothing, and a few moments ago, his curiosity had the better of him, and he had taken a look at it._

_What he had seen had frozen him on his spot._

_A book flying in the air… A piece of paper flying out of it… Two ‘trials’... Hellfire and Holy Water…_

_Aziraphale and Crowley…_

_He remembered gasping to try to shake the pure terror that had taken hold of his heart at the vision._

_No...They… They… Oh, God…!_

_No! He couldn't let that happen! Maybe he did a mistake, but he was going to fix it!_

_No matter what!_

_Taking a piece of paper he tried to remember how the nutter witch used to write back then..._

~*~

Both Crowley and Aziraphale were sitting on a bench, waiting for the bus. The delivery man was already away, his package tucked under one arm.

Crowley just offered Aziraphale to come to his place, as his bookshop was now in ashes, to which the angel had eventually said yes.

Apart from them, there was no one in the street, except for a young boy, his hand in his pocket and headphones on the ears coming their way, his silhouette illuminated by the fog lights of the bus coming behind him.

Crowley made a movement of the hand and the driver stopped the vehicle at their height, and both angel and demon stood up to get in.

“Wait, sir.” said a voice behind them, and Crowley stopped to look at the boy who was walking down the alley. He was half bent, grabbing something from the ground.

“You dropped that.” he continued, extending one hand with a piece of paper in it.

The boy seemed to be in his early twenty, with shoulder-length curly red hair and piercing blue eyes. And somehow, he looked almost familiar.

The demon almost declined it, saying that it wasn’t his until his eyes caught strange words written on it.

“Oh, uh, thanks, I suppose,” he answered, taking the paper and putting it in his pocket.

“You’re welcome, sir.” said the young man with a smile which seemed achingly familiar, “But you should get in this bus now. I think your husband is waiting for you.” continued the blue-eyed boy, and as Crowley could almost hear the teasing tone in the human voice, he found himself spluttering, red as a tomato, before sending a quick “Goodbye, boy” and climbing in the bus.

“What did he want?” asked Aziraphale as Crowley went to sit next to him.

And if his hand naturally slip into the angel awaiting one’s, the no one comment about it.

“He said that I had drop something. I was going to say no until I get a glimpse of what it looks like,” he explained while showing the piece of paper to the angel, “seems like old Agnes had one last prophecy to give us, after all.” he continued, and Aziraphale read the words written with a slight frown, squeezing the demon’s hand between his fingers.

_Choofe your faces wisely, huh…?_

The bus went away, taking with him two eternal beings who had choose Humanity over their respective side, and the young man had given the piece of paper to a demon who once was an Archangel smiled to himself and blinked once to reveal shinning purple eyes.

Then, with a ‘pop’, Gabriel disappeared.

~*~

Maybe they could fool Uriel, Sandalphon and Michael.

Maybe they could fool Hastur, Dagon and Beelzebub.

Maybe they could fool all God’s creation.

But they couldn’t fool him.

As Gabriel went into the room where ‘Aziraphale’ had been put in, he instantly knew that it wasn’t the angel who was there… But a certain demon instead.

He knew too well how his little brother aura was to bee fooled by their swap, even if he had to admit they did quite a good job at it.

_Oh! How he was proud of them!_

There was a lot of things that Gabriel wanted to do at this moment, and one of them was to take his little brother in his arms and tell him all he had on his heart the very Beginning, and even before. Of how much he loved him and that the only thing he wanted was for him to be happy.

But he couldn’t. It was how things were in this world.

He never was meant to be a part of his brothers' happiness. And to be sure that everything went for the better for the two of them, he had to play his role one more time.

He exchanged a few words with ‘Aziraphale’, the Hellfire was brought in, marking the moment that would end everything.

“Oh well,” ‘Aziraphale’ murmured, “Lovely knowing you all. Maybe meet on better occasion.” he said almost sarcastically, and Gabriel gave the last blow.

“Just shut your stupid mouth, and die already.” declared the Archangel, punctuating with a friendly-fake-smile.

And the look inside ‘Aziraphale’ eyes was enough to kill him in the inside.

Then the angel stepped into the fire.

~*~

As angels were toasting to the world at the Ritz and that a nightingale was singing for the very first in Berkeley Square, a lonely Archangel was looking down at the Earth fro one of the windows of his office.

Michael had come back from Hell quite disrupted and went to her quarters to rest a little. She promised him that once she’ll feel better, they would go to their little flight but that, for the moment, she needed to rest.

Gabriel didn’t blame her. He would have been in the same state if he hadn’t known. But he did, and he hoped that it would be one of the last secrets he’d have to keep for the rest of eternity.

Sending a quick note to the other archangels to notified them that he was going for a flight of his own, he spread his wings and went straight into the big universe, before letting himself drifted along the currents of the space. And as he breathed int the smells of the stars, Gabriel could almost see his little Raphael flying next to him, his crystal laughs resonating around them as a little ball of light shone between his hands.

Eventually, he came across Alpha Century, and the Archangel paused to watch from afar his brother’s most prized creation, and a small, sad smile graced his lips.

He wasn’t meant to be the good guy in their story, and it was okay. He always knew it. He had learned to live with this fact. He had learned it as soon as the secrets he kept began to be too much for him. And he didn’t know if he would ever have a chance to make amends with them, but it was okay.

As long as his family was happy, then Gabriel was happy.

He had a lot of people counting on him right now, and he had to protect them. Aziraphale and Crowley were more than capable of taking care of themselves. They had each other, after all.

Still, it didn’t mean that Gabriel wouldn’t keep an eye on them, that for certain.

And as he was alone in the middle of the immensity of the space, floating next to one of the most beautiful stars Raphael-now-Crowley had created, the Archangel allowed himself to cry.

And cry he did. Big, fat sobs shook his being as he let thousands of years of grief and loneliness and sadness out of his body. He cried, cried, cried until his throat hurt and beyond, and still, it wasn’t enough.

He hadn’t cried since after the Fall of the Man, and Gabriel could feel all the tension he had accumulated over the years lifted from his shoulder, even if there was still a little weight in the middle of his stomach, and he knew that he could never get rid of it.

But it was okay.

Suddenly, a presence filled the air around him, and Gabriel felt what would have been arms, if the being had been something else, enveloping him, and the Archangel broke once again as he buried his face into Her chest.

Soft hands caressed his hair and back, and a kiss was planted on his forehead.

**Oh my dear, sweet child… You have been so strong, **She said, and Gabriel grip on Her tightened.

“Did… Did I do well? Helping them? Trying to fix my mistakes?” he asked, and it was not only about the bit of prophecy missing but also about all he could have done better and...

Her love enveloped him, putting a halt at his invading thought as She soothed his worries away.

**Yes, yes you did, my dear Gabriel… You outdid yourself, and I couldn’t be more proud of you.**

The Archangel was shaking and crying and She said nothing else, simply hugging him with all the love She had for him, murmuring soothing words in his ears as he let out all of his repressed emotions over the years.

Eventually, Gabriel released a little of his grip on Her, enough for him to look into Her face (that he couldn’t really see), and with a shaking breath, said:

“It’s not over, is it? Both Heaven and Hell… They still want their War…” he murmured, “They will try to find a way to deal with Aziraphale and Crowley, right? They won’t leave them alone for a very long time…” he continued, and his fist clenched on Her clothes, “And I won’t be able to protect them…”

She put one hand on his cheek, rubbing one tear away with Her thumb.

**Worry not, my dear Child. You already did enough, and you deserve to rest too. Nothing will happen before long, I promise. I can’t tell you more, unfortunately, but I can tell you that everything will turn out for the better in the end. **

“Really?” asked Gabriel in a small voice, and for a moment, he had the feeling to be back in his very first years of life.

**Really**, smiled God, and she kissed him one more time on the forehead.

**I can’t stay with you anymore, my dear Gabriel, but I promise you that we’ll see each other again. And no matter what, never forget that I love you. _All of you._**

Gabriel nodded, swallowing the lump in his throat.

“I love you too, Mother.”

The smile She gave him was blinding, and the Archangel found himself surrounded by Her love. A blink of an eye later, and he was back in his office, Her presence still lingering inside his chest, yet a little faint, like a good dream that disappeared little by little after waking up

For a second, he wondered if what he hadn’t imagined all of this until a small piece of paper flew in front of him.

Taking it, Gabriel unfolded it, and the smile that followed was full of tears.

And as he kissed the words on it, he sent a prayer Her way for the happiness of his whole family.

** _I’m proud of you, My Child._ **

** _With love,_ **

** _Mother._ **


	2. Information

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Secret series

Hey guys!

I hope you're all doing well? 

This is a quite 'update' to inform you that I'm working on a sequel to this OS. It's going to be called 'Broken'. 

Dunno if it's going to be stand-alone or a multi-chaptered story. Depending on how I'm going to plan everything.

As I'm a uni student, I cannot tell you when exactly I'm going to publish the next part, but it's on his way! 

(and for your information, it's going to be shorter than this one, so you know)

Until I publish the next part, I hope you'll all have an amazing day! :D

Mitsuki~

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! o/ And please, leave a comment to tell me what you thought of this! :D


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